Signs of the times

Well, It's been longer than I thought since my last post. I was hoping to get to this pretty regularly during the last part of my time here in Costa Rica, but that has proved more difficult than anticipated. I'm down to just over a week left now. It's going both quickly and slowly at the same time. (yeah, it doesn't make sense to me either) It seems like the more I think about getting to go home and how little time I have left, the days seem to creep by, but then when I look at how much time I've actually spent here I wonder where 4 and a half months went so quickly. It seems almost surreal that I'm almost done already, and things have just been getting busier as December 23rd approaches. I'll try to catch you up on all that's been going on.

It was strange being away from home for Thanksgiving. There really hasn't been a major holiday that I can think of that I've been away from my family. I think what made it more weird than a normal day is that I knew exactly where I would have been and exactly what I would have been doing if I was still at home. Every year we go to my aunt's house where she prepares one of the most delicious meals I eat all year and my grandpa and great uncle sit around picking on each other and drinking $3 wine. Luckily I'll be around to sample her cooking and the family atmosphere for Christmas. It was nice, at least, to be able to see them all and talk on Skype. It was the first time I'd actually "seen" some of them since before I left. Of course everyone had to comment about my hair being longer and the fact that I appeared to be losing a little weight. (No need to worry, with Christmas food and a few trips to the Mizzou Cafeteria next semester I should be back to normal in no time) I did however, get a chance to celebrate the holiday myself. There are several faculty members here from the states and they all gather with their families every year to give thanks and have a good time. It was nice having an evening of English and the food was amazing. All the usual stuff was there: turkey, stuffing, gravy, green bean casserole, and canned cranberry sauce. (Canned is always the best) They even had pumpkin, apple, and pecan pies for desert. It was a good night and I got to meet some really interesting people.

From that point on school started to pick up a little, and it was the first time this semester that I felt like I was really in school. Things had been difficult up to this point but really only because of the language stuff. In the past couple weeks, with classes coming to a close, projects and papers had to be turned in. I've done three presentations (all in Spanish, luckily the professors cut me a little slack I think), written a handful of papers, and had to finish up a research project that I started at the beginning of the semester involving rooting hormones on pineapple. While most of that is behind me now, I still have a few loose ends to tie up and a couple finals to take next week. I've only got a couple trips left to the golf course and we've actually been getting some nice weather and have been able to do some more stuff there. I think I'll probably stay there to round out my last few days in the country. Can't beat the free room, and it'll be easier to get to the airport from there than from the University.

There hasn't been much else going on, but I have already had to say goodbye to a few people. A couple of the other study abroad students opted to take their finals and everything early and left today to do a little traveling before heading back to their respective countries. Another will be leaving Wednesday and I think I'll be among the last to head out. Graduation for the fourth year students was yesterday as well. It was a good ceremony, but man was it long. It took three hours to graduate 90 people. (That doesn't make me to excited about my own graduation in May) I didn't know many of the fourth year students as I only had class with about 9 of them, but it was another few people to say goodbye to and campus seems a lot emptier with only first and second year students left. (All the third years are doing internships) We've had a few more sunnier days lately but have still gotten a lot of rain. I'm convinced that the day after I leave will mark the start of a 4 month sunny season. (I seem to have that luck... When I went to San Antonio a couple years ago it snowed for the first time since the 80's)

So, it's hard to ignore that things are wrapping up. Thinking back to the day I arrived and my few weeks at the language school seems like forever ago. Even when I try not to think about it, I have little reminders all over the place. The jar containing my malaria vaccine has acted as a little orange translucent hour glass losing one pill every week and now I'm down to just a few. I have a daily devotional book that I read and the number of pages between where I'm at and the back of the book is getting pretty thin. Christmas decorations are now in full swing. (granted they started back before Halloween) It seems funny to me that they celebrate Christmas the same way we do, with images of snowmen and reindeer even though most people here have never seen snow and complain about being cold in weather that could easily pass as shorts weather, or at most a light jacket.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not upset that I'll be done soon. I'm definitely ready to come home and see family and friends again. I wouldn't mind exchanging rain for snow either. So no, that's not it, I'm not upset that it's ending but rather just trying to take it all in. The fact remains that I still have about a week and a half left and, like I've been saying for the past couple months, I don't want to check out early. I still want to experience what's in store for these next several days and let God use them how he sees fit. I want to use these days to prepare for coming home, not mentally booking a flight back to Missouri. I want to take advantage of the time I have with the new people I've met here. I finished my last blog with, "Let's finish well" and maybe that's even more important now. So, keep me in your prayers. Pray that I'll be prepared for coming home and beginning the next chapter. Pray that I'll leave with great new relationships and friends. Pray that I continue to listen to God and not just focus on the calendar in my head, checking off days as they go by. There's only a little left and I can't wait to see you all again. I'll probably try to write again just before I leave. Until then I'll leave you guys with a verse that I've really come to appreciate being away for so long.

Phil 1:3-5
I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now

Invisible Mountains

One more month. I can't tell whether time is going by fast or slow. There are times that it feels like both. The fact is that I've been here a while, but I can't lose sight of the fact that it's not over. I've been missing home A LOT lately and that sucks. Obviously I don't want to feel this way (in actuality I never thought I would very much) but have to deal with the fact that I do. I have to fight the temptation to just drudge through these last weeks only thinking about the end, and actually take full advantage of them. I know I've been here a while, and if it was over tomorrow would feel satisfied with the amount of time I've spent here and the amount I've learned. Turns out it's not over tomorrow and I don't think that's just an arbitrary thing. I'm here for 5 months (minus some change) and I think God intends to use all of that time. It's not like he only wanted me here for 4 months but could only find a 5 month program on the internet so I'm just stuck here to do whatever I feel for the next 4 weeks. No, I think that I'm here for the precise amount of time that he wants me to be here and I need to make myself available to him. I have to learn to be content despite any longings to be back with family and friends or even just the extra freedom that I have at home. God wants this next month and I'm going to try my best to give it to him.

As you might be able to tell from the first paragraph, I'm dealing with some stuff. As with just about everything else that I've experienced in my time here, I've never dealt with this situation before. The past few weeks have been a roller coaster of confusion. I haven't been able to wrap my head around much and actually tonight I sat down opened a word document and just started writing. Thankfully it help. I thought about just throwing that on here but it ended up being about 5 pages long so I'll just try to use some of the clarity that I gained from that exercise here. (If you do want to read a copy of that, just leave a comment with your e-mail, or e-mail me and ask.) I'll try to tap into most of the relevant stuff a little bit here.

As far as events in my life this weeks been pretty average. One thing that was pretty cool was a dinner that my non-traditional crops class organized. I guess this is a yearly tradition for the class. They choose a theme (non-traditional theme of course, meaning it's usually a typical food from a foreign country.) This year we decided to do fondue since we have an exchange student from Switzerland in the class. It was great. We all got together about a week in advance and did a little sample run through with all the food to make sure everything would work and what changes we needed to make for the real thing. We ate a lot. The menu consisted of a first course of Honduran fondue (refried beans mixed with melted mozzarella and served with tortilla chips) The second course was the typical cheese fondue with three types of cheese served with hard bread and veggies. Then we had the meat! mmmmm. Each group had their own pot of hot oil in which to cook pieces or raw steak and fresh shrimp. (There was lots of this left over in the back so us workers got our fill too) The desert consisted of a mixture of different fruits drizzled with chocolate fondue. (I'm getting hungry again) In addition to all of this we had student representatives from various countries performing traditional dances for the guest. It was really entertaining and they were really good. Overall it was a lot of fun and a big success as everyone repeatedly thanked us afterward.

In other food news I've been invited to Thanksgiving dinner next Saturday. The American faculty members and their families apparently get together to celebrate holidays that they don't have here, and myself and the other American students get to tag along. I know it won't be the same as it is with family, but it'll be a nice taste of home and it'll be nice to speak in English for a night. (I'm noticing that a lot of my news from my time here has been about food.)

On a non edible note, however, is classes. With the semester drawing to an end it's time for big projects to be due. I have two rather large reports/presentations due within the next two weeks in my fourth year class (which ends in two weeks since the seniors will be graduating) and another presentation to add on top of that for another one of my classes. This will be the first time since I've been here that I'll be super loaded with strictly school work. I'm usually able to get enough motivation as due dates approach but will have to be a little more strategic with the twice a week trips to San Jose getting in the way.

As for the internal aspects of my life the past week or so, that's where it gets a little more confusing. I've noticed recently that I've been getting annoyed really easily and pretty often, which if you know me, isn't very characteristic. It really bothered me, and for obvious reasons I didn't like it. I thought I was turning into the scrooge or something. It seemed to me like I had been put in a room next to the most obnoxious people on campus and that I always had to sit by the people on the bus that would hang a little too far over the side of the armrest. Who knows, maybe I was being exposed to abnormal amount of inconveniences. What I did realize however, is that I was expecting everyone to accommodate me. I was doing a crappy job at loving everyone even if they're a little noise while I'm trying to sleep, or taking up more than their allotted space and encroaching into mine, or just anyone that isn't necessarily easy to love. God commands us to love as he loved, to die to ourselves, and to be servants and slaves to everyone (Mat. 20:26-28) I wasn't doing that and it was showing in my attitude, if even only to me.

So I've already used the word confusing a few times and nothing I've said so far seems to be that confusing. I don't even know how to explain why things are confusing other than to say that they are. Like with what I feel like God is trying to teach me lately. Well, the answer that I've come up with is precisely "confusion" or maybe put better, just not knowing. I definitely feel that God has been working in my life these past couple weeks and felt like he was teaching me. I just couldn't put into words or even know myself what was going on. Maybe I'm not supposed to. I think that's it. Or maybe it's not that I'm not supposed to, but rather it doesn't matter if I don't know what's going on or what God is doing. It's not required that I know what God is doing in order for him to do it. The only thing that I need to be worried about is being in right relation with him. I need to be pursuing my relationship with him and going to him and listening and obeying and nothing else matters. As long as I'm doing that and not trying to figure out what I think God should do or what I think is best, God is going to accomplish what he wants to accomplish. As long as I'm doing that, God can use me whether I'm aware of it or not. "I don't know" isn't always a wrong answer.

So I guess to wrap up I'd just like you guys to be praying for me. I hope you'd ask God to give me the strength to be strong and patient these next few weeks, that I'd keep my mind here and on him. I'm not saying that I'm not going to be looking forward to coming home and that that's not something I should be hopeful and joyful about, just that I don't want that to become the entirety of my remaining time. Pray for me in the little things like getting homework done and not wasting too much time on ESPN.com. Pray for my attitude and that I'll be able to love the people around me even if it's just for a quick bus trip. Pray that I would be able to be vulnerable to God to use this last month anyway he'd like. I miss you guys a lot and I know that it's going to be great when I see you again. I look forward to hearing from you all over these next few weeks and it always fills me with joy when i get to talk to you, but right now I'm here and I think that's exactly where God wants me to be. Let's finish well.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Panamania

Oh man... it's been a while since I've done this. Sorry to those of you who have checked for an update recently to find the same old posts. It's been a pretty crazy last few weeks, but I'm going to have to blame laziness for the delay. Anyway, here we go. (I didn't proof read this either, so sorry in anything doesn't make sense.)

About 2 and a half weeks ago I headed out of Costa Rica and headed toward Panama with a hand full of other students. It was closing in on my three month visa limit and pretty conveniently I was going to have the whole following week free. (The first year student had there week of integration that meant no first year classes for the week. My fourth year class was also canceled.) I left at 6 am on Saturday with two other exchange students (some others had left a day or two before). We had a relatively painless time getting to the border and once there had to walk over this big bridge that happened to have a board missing hear or there, so you had to pay attention where you stepped. Once across the bridge and officially in Panama we had to pay our gringo fee (the students from other countries didn't have to pay anything.) and then we were of to the island of Bocas del Toro. To get there you had to take a bus or taxi to the water and then from there take a water taxi to the island. We managed to get suckered a little bit and had to pay a little more than we should have for all that. It's all part of the experience though, right? Once on the island we weren't exactly sure where the others were. We had agreed on a couple different hostels and went around checking for them. After an unsuccessful loop we decided just to get rooms and hope we ran into them later. They did eventually find us when we were cooking dinner that night. We visited a few different beaches, most of which were pretty empty and with the clearest ocean water I'd ever seen. We also got a chance to go snorkeling and see come of the coral just of the coast in a few different places. I don't think it's necessarily a snorkeling hot spot of the world, but for a first timer it was pretty cool to see the different kinds of coral and fish. I even found a whole sand dollar that I dove down and got, but unfortunately it broke in my hand before I could get it back to the boat. We also took a boat tour to this cove that several dolphins swimming around in it. I wasn't able to get many good pictures of them as there were like 8 or 9 boats driving around trying to see them. One did jump completely out of the water one time though, which was really cool. Other than that we just kind of used the few days there to relax, eat some non cafeteria food (the Indian restaurant was delicious) and just get to know each other better. It was nice spending sometime together away from school and seeing people in a different setting. I think it brought us all closer together.

We all left on the fourth day and me and my friend Chelsea decided to break the trip back into two days, so we stopped in Peurto Viejo on the way back. I'd already gone to Puerto Viejo at the beginning of the my time here, but this stay was a bit different. (Side note: I found my first mango since I've been here at a little fruit stand there, and it was SOOOO good. I bought two) We decided to stay at this place that Chelsea had heard about called Rockin J's. This place was really cool and unique, but I doubt I would have stayed there if it had just been me. I glad I did though. It was an interesting experience. They had a few rooms with bunk beds for rent as well as a "Pimp Suite" (Not sure exactly what that consists of) but most of the property was filled with Tents on the raised covered deck, or two pavilions that housed about 60 hammocks each. when you rented your tent/hammock you were also given a key to a locker to keep all your stuff in. The place was decorated pretty cool too. pretty much all the walls or doors were covered with some sort of random mural. All the tables had been covered with random stuff as well, from money to cell phones all glued and sealed to the surface. There were signs mandating daily showers, a 30 day stay limit and my favorite, a sign prohibiting the smoking of marijuana and telling anyone who wanted to partake to take it to the beach. To cap it all off there was a metal wire dragon along the top of the outside wall protecting from intruders. After we checked in we hitch hike down the road a ways and find a good beach. (sorry mom) After walking a little ways and getting passed up by several cars we got picked up by a guy that just stopped next to us and didn't even get off his phone once we got in. Once his call was over and we got to talking we found out that he owns one of the first hotels built in Puerto Viejo called Playa Chiquita. He was a really cool guy and his name was Wolf. (Not like a mean nickname or anything... he was German and I guess that's a normal name there. Either way it's sweet) We got to his hotel and he pointed us in the way of the beach and told us we could use his property as long as we wanted. It had been raining most of the day and was still a little overcast which gave the beach a cool feel to it. After we were done swimming decided to walk back to our hostel along the beach instead of the road again. This was a great idea because on the way we came across this momma dog with three little puppies, one of which looked a lot like my dog Toby did when he was little. The rest of the night was pretty chill and the town was pretty dead. (It was a Tuesday in the off season) I got up early the next day and headed back to the University by myself since Chelsea didn't have to back back and wanted to visit some friends she had made there a few months ago. The trip back wasn't too bad and I was able to navigate it pretty easily. I met another guy from the states that going the same way as me for most of the trip so I was able to talk to him for a while too.

I got back to school and had just about enough time to eat shower and pack before leaving again that afternoon for the golf course in San Jose. With my extra free days I decided I'd work (Wed.-Mon.) instead of just wasting them inevitably sitting in front of my computer all day at the school. I'm really glad I went. Even though I'd been away from the University the few days before this was also a much deeded break and change of scenery. I was able to relax as I had a lot of time to myself in the afternoons and evenings. I was able to get to know the people that I'm working with a little better than I would have if I hadn't been there more than just one day at a time. I was able to go to a couple movies (Zohan and Saw 5) and the guy that works in the club house gave me a stack of coupons for free meals at Taco Bell, so I hit that up a couple times as well. One of the really cool things about this trip though was that I was able to go to church for the first time in 3 months. The assistant superintendent (Deborah, who actually graduated from EARTH a couple years ago) attends a church about a block or so away from the golf course so I went with her to youth night on Friday. They weren't kidding when they said youth night. Besides me and Deborah and the guys leading the group, everyone else was at least 5 years younger than me. It was good though. It was nice to be able to worship with people again, even if I didn't know what all the words meant. It was even fun playing the game of the night, 4 on the couch. I actually got pretty into it, always gotta try to win everything. (which my team did) I was even able to meet up with Daniel (my old Spanish teacher) to get some coffee, catch up a little, and mainly just to give him his keys back for him mom's house. Work was good too. Like I said I got to spend a good amount of time with the other people that work there and got to know them better, but I also learned some stuff too. Probably my favorite was learning how to use the greens mower. It's what's called a real mower that has blades that rotate on a cylinder instead of the typical helicopter style mowers. It's actually harder to operate than it looks. That, combined with rainy season wet and steep inclines can be pretty tricky. (I only fell down the hill once though. Apparently it happens to everyone when they're learning)

Since then things have gone back to normal. I've been busy with classes and I've started my normal rotation of Mondays and Wednesdays at the golf course. I feel like I've been learning a lot from God lately too, to the point where I'm still kind of mulling through it right now and if I start writing in my confusion will probably just ramble on more than usual, so I'll save that and try to write something this weekend. Plus I need to catch up on some sleep, so I guess that's where I'll leave things for now. I think I'll pretty much be in this same schedule from now until the end of classes, but I'll try to keep up with the posts a little better. Thanks again for reading, and I just want you to know that I appreciate all the prayers that you send my way, and know that I'm trying to return the favor.

Clarity

First thing's first... The pool opened today!!!! I haven't been back yet, but you better believe that tomorrow after work I'm gonna be soakin up some rays. Gotta work on my base tan for Panama. That's right, I said Panama. My visa expires in about a week and a half so I "have to" leave the country for 3 days. This is actually the perfect time. The first year students have their integration week next week. (Not sure exactly what that is but they have activities all week and therefore I have none of my first year classes) Also, the fourth year class that I'm taking is canceled for the next couple weeks since we spent so much time on that field trip about a month ago. Therefore, I have the whole week free after Saturday and won't have to miss any classes. The other exchange students and I are going to a little island place via ferry just across the Costa Rica border. I'll be sure to take tons of picture. I'm not sure exactly when we'll return. I guess it depends on if we want to make the journey down to the canal or not. Either way I'll be gone til at least Wednesday.

I started my first day of work this week and it was really good. I left here around one on Sunday for San Jose (took about 4 1/2 hours to get to the course) and when I got there had to find the Hector, the guy that runs the club house. He came and picked me up at the front gate and we went first to his house to get some sheets and a pillow for me to sleep on, then to a grocery store to get anything I might need for my short stay. He showed me the room that I was going to stay in which was basically a fold out couch against one wall, and boxes and other storage stuff shoved into the other side of the room. It was still a little early and without really asking Hector told me to come with him and he drove me around showing me the area and all the things that I should know. Then we even went a little out of San Jose to Cartago, which was apparently the first capitol of Costa Rica. We drove by the old church ruins which is a pretty big tourist site, then parked at the center of town which encircles a giant cathedral where an image of the Virgin Mary supposedly appeared some years ago. The place was gorgeous but there was a mass going on so we were only able to see the outside. On our way back Hector stopped us off at a Chinese restaurant that he frequents and wouldn't let me pay for anything. It was a little rough sleeping that night, (The couch wasn't too comfortable and I didn't really know what to expect the next day so I kept thinking about that.) but I was able to get a decent nights rest before I had to get up at 5 am. The morning was nice and cool outside and felt great, which made it really funny to see everyone showing up in jackets and even a scarf. For my first assignment I went with a guy named Miguel to fill in divots on all the tee boxes and driving range that were made over the weekend. Miguel is an older guy and a pretty interesting one at that. He was really easy to talk to and at one point after we were talking about who we thought would win the presidential election he just out of nowhere said "Jesus, I am Christian, I love Jesus!" It was great! It was the only thing he said in English all day, and he even said Jesus like "Gee-zus" not "Hey-zeus". The topic of church and God came up a couple more times that day and it was nice to at least try to talk about it a little. He even shared part of his testimony with me and from what I understood I was really encouraged. The assistant superintendent was pretty open with being a Christian also. Looks like I may have finally found some resemblance of a community here after all. After we filled holes I was sent off to help dig one... A big one. With it being the rainy season, there's a lot of water and a certain low spot was pretty soaked so we were digging it up and replacing the clay soil with rock and sand to help with the drainage. It was hard work, but I liked it and was able to get to know the other people working there too. I finished my day around three as the rain started coming in. The bus ride back was a little more efficient as it only took me about 3 hours until I was at the cafeteria eating dinner. I was very satisfied with my first day and will probably be going back for Mondays and Wednesdays for the next 7 weeks of the semester. It'll be a lot of bus rides but I hope it's worth it.

Classes are still going pretty well. I'm lost a lot of the time, but I've been able to get everything turned in on time so far and I've even had my first two tests this past week. They were a little intimidating, knowing that they'd be all in Spanish. For one of my classes a lot of the material came from articles that took me way too long to read since I had to keep stopping and looking up words and then going back and trying to remember the information. Despite all of that I think they went pretty well. I haven't gotten the results back yet, but I feel pretty good. I mean, I only have to pass.

Not only have I been receiving some clarity with schedule and school stuff, but I feel like I've been hearing from God a little more clearly lately too. I've been a little more regular with my time spent with Him and just my overall focus I think, and I've been seeing a difference. One of the things that seems to keep coming up a lot lately is dying to myself and making myself a servant to others. God's really been showing me the areas of my life that I've been being selfish and really challenging me with developing a legitimate servants attitude. (not looking for praise or noticeable acts or serving when it serves me) My pride's definitely taken a few hits lately. I think another area that God's been getting at me lately is my obsession for efficiency and production. I'm learning that the sign of a good disciple isn't busyness or how much he gets done, but where his focus is. Jesus spent hours with God, and often even left to get away and be alone. Heck, one time he was told that his friend was dying and he stayed for two more days were he was before going to him. (Of course he raised the guy from the dead once he got there, but you know what I mean.) Anyway I guess what I'm saying is that I'm trying not to worry about what I'm "doing" here or what changes as a result of all of this, and am just trying to follow and focus on God and let the chips fall where they may. It sounds obvious... If we keep our eyes on God and listen to and follow his voice, then he's going to accomplish what he has planned. But I think a lot of time we get the idea in our head that we know what needs to be done and we spend all our energy on that then we get to busy miss when that fleeting really important thing happens. I'm not saying that we should just sit around and wait for something to fall on our laps, but that our work should be going to God and listening and following what HE wants us to do. I'm think that's what Jesus did.

This Thursday is a milestone for two reasons. One... it's my birthday! It'll be my first away from family and friends and I'm not saying this so that you'll all have to remember and tell me happy birthday. (Facebook does that well enough.) I don't have anything specific planned for that day, but I don't have any class, so I think sleeping in will be a good way to celebrate. I've also heard some rumors that some of the students here might be planning a little something. Hopefully there's cake. Thursday also marks the beginning of my last two months here. Even though it's only about 10 days different, 2 months sounds like a lot shorter amount of time then half way does. Who knows if it'll fly or drag? Who knows if it'll be full of challenges or bliss or moments of both or something all together different? All I know is that there will be days that I say "I only have 2 months left" and days that I say "I still have two months left." Whatever happens, I'm thankful for that time and will do with it the best I know how.

Golf, Cameras, and Sushi

It's the end of the third quarter and I'm tired of watching the Tigers suck it up so I thought this would be a good time to write. Another week of classes and I'm getting pretty well adjusted to the routine. Things have slowed down a bit which is good and what I wanted, but still kind of hard at the same time. Next week marks the midpoint of my time abroad. (I thought it was this week, but I was wrong) My Spanish is improving little by little and I'm making more of an effort to use it now than I have been before. Classes are becoming a little easier to understand, but also getting busier with tests and projects piling up. I still can't seem to get completely in the mind set that I'm at an actual school since it's so different here with the schedule and structure and just the surroundings.

Last weekend I made the trip to San Jose to meet Arnoldo Quiros, the superintendent at Monteran golf course just a little outside of the city. I left campus on Monday and had to figure out the bus system to get to San Jose. The bus from EARTH only goes to a little town just down the road, so I had to go from there to Guapiles about 30 minutes away, and from Guapiles I was able to hop on a bus to San Jose, and never really had to wait long at either place. When I got to San Jose I called up my friend Daniel. (He was my Spanish teacher the first month I was here.) Daniel had told me that I could stay at his mom's house when he heard I might be working in San Jose and needing a place to live, but I wasn't able to get a hold of him directly to tell him that I was coming into town that day. Luckily he was home and was able to meet me at the mall. So after hiking down town and finding another bus to the mall I met up with Daniel and he was able to give me keys to his house and draw me a crude map on how to get there before he headed off to work. After boarding two more buses and continually questioning whether I just passed the stop that I needed, I finally arrived at the right place. (Got everything right the first time. I was kind of impressed.) I entered through the front gate that guarded the entrance for three homes, and made my way trying to find the little path I was supposed to take as was illustrated on the map. This path really was little and kind of over grown and really wet because it'd been raining. I made my way to the house and was greeted by a barking dog and the smiles of Daniel's mom and her sister. We talked a little bit and I was able to explain my situation and she was able to lay down some ground rules. She's a very nice lady and was super helpful. She even gave me extra blankets so I wouldn't get cold. The next morning was back to the buses. I needed to go downtown and from there I didn't know what bus I needed and had to figure it out. At first I got on the wrong one but fortunately it was headed in the right direction and was able to drop me off where I could get on the right bus. I showed up to the gated community of Monteran and had to approach the security guard and tell him why I was there. After a few minutes of waiting I got picked up by Arnoldo in a golf cart and we took off to tour the place. The first part we drove through was full of huge houses and gorgeous landscaping. (He told me they go for about a million dollars a piece.) We eventually made it to the golf course where we stopped at each of the nine holes, one of which had an amazing view overlooking the City. As we drove around we talked about what I wanted to do there and what he expected of me. After all that was out of the way and I'd met the other people that worked there we decided that it would be in the best interest of both of us for me to come help out a few days a week. He's a really cool guy and I think I can learn a lot from him and the experience even if he doesn't speak English very well. (Just another way we can help each other out) The only thing unresolved when i left was where I'd be staying when i was in San Jose. It took a few days to hear back from him and it sounds like I may just be sleeping in his office while I'm there, unless they can find somewhere else later on. He also offered to bring me food so I wouldn't have to buy it every day. I'm still not sure exactly when I'll start, maybe this Monday. Communication down here seems to be a lot less efficient than in the states, but hopefully I can get him on the phone tomorrow.

Some other great news came by the way of mail last week. My friend/roommate Keith had told me he was sending me a package but wouldn't tell me what was in it. Needless to say, I was curious. I got a call Monday night (about two and a half weeks later) telling me that I needed to stop by the mail room and sign for a package. Since I was already getting ready to go to the library with Tony, a guy who's in my group for a class project, we just decided to swing by there on the way. The box was just short of being bomb proof I think. After wrestling with it for a few minutes (and fortunately not breaking any of the contents) I was able to pry the top off and find out what treasures awaited me. What I pulled out was brand new Cannon digital Camera accompanied with notes from friends, and even some movies. (I'll be posting links so my photo albums at the bottom of the blog for those of you who don't have facebook.) There was a list of about 19 people that pitched in to cover the cost. I was taken aback and surprised (Tony was impressed too), but when I think about it I shouldn't have been. It's just like them to do something like that, and I've totally been blessed with some great friends. The camera was great, but I actually think the notes had the biggest impact. They came at a time that I'd been feeling a pretty overwhelmed and lonely and all that kind of went away when I was reminded of all the people that were thinking about me and caring about me. What could be more important than that, right? It's kind of strange, but my Tourette's had been acting up worse than it's been since senior year of high school, (If any of you were in my anatomy class when Mr. Sells asked if I needed to go to the nurse, you know what I'm talking about) but since the beginning of this week I've hardly noticed it at all.

Last time I updated I talked about a field trip I went on with one of my classes, Cultivos No Tradicionales with professor Panfilo Taborra. Well this week that same professor took us on a trip to San Jose to check out some specialty supermarkets, (like oriental and import stuff) and afterward took us to a prety nice Chinese restaurant where we were treated with sushi, some other deliciousness that I didn't recognize, and even teppanyaki. (you know, when they cook the food right in front of you and flip and throw the food all around.) I also had some "mango verde" juice to drink which was sooo good. I can't believe that actually counts as class. Desert was even included. He's definitely my favorite professor that I've ever had. He's a little loopy, but he smiles more than anyone I know, is super generous, and has an answer for anything you could possibly ask him.

So as I said in one of my earlier blogs, I'm here because I feel like this is where God wanted me this semester. I still don't know exactly why and I think I'm starting to be OK with that. I know that God is going to use this time and that I'll be a different person for it. I guess I've just been expecting this big super significant miraculous thing to happen, expecting Him to totally come in and turn me into... I don't even know what, or to take this campus and make it full of people crazy for him over night. But what if that's not how God works? Maybe what God is doing here and in me is (in my eyes) a little thing. I don't want this to turn into a sermon or anything about how and when God intervenes or try to dissect the examples in the bible. I don't know if I could even do a very good job of that. I just know that when I really think about it I don't think God typically works in big over powering miracles, but rather with a soft whisper and a simple request, "Come unto me." Sometimes he doesn't let us know where we're going or even what exactly we're supposed to be doing along the way. That's where I'm finding myself now. I'm always asking "What's the purpose of me being here?" and "What do I need to be doing right now?" I haven't really got an answer for those. Maybe I'm asking the wrong questions, or maybe God is being silent on purpose and I just have to know that he is good and that he hears me. What I do know is that God wants me to come to him, and as long as I do that then everything else will be taken care of. I don't know why we feel like we have to be doing something all the time or like we have to be "useful" and "productive". Like the God of the universe can't do what he wants without our help? He's in control. I just have to learn to listen. I just have to learn how to go to him, obey, and leave everything else in his hands.

Here's the links to all my photo albums since I've been here:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2287348&l=e9536&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2287738&l=44227&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2292083&l=8db40&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2293962&l=316aa&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2294306&l=f5c69&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2294999&l=71f54&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2303568&l=da66e&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2303891&l=92ef7&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2303893&l=699d7&id=15935002

I'll try to post the links for other albums when I make them too.
(for some reason I don't think all these are working, so if you want just send me an e-mail and I'll resend you the links there... bwbb66@mizzou.edu)

Finca Hopping

Hey guys, so I know it's been a while and I apologize for keeping you all waiting. I guess I haven't really written since the first few days of classes here. Since then things have kind of been getting more into routine, but there's still a lot of change going on. Waking up in the mornings has surprisingly not been too much of a problem. It helps that I'm not staying up until 2 or 3 a.m. here every night, which is pretty common for me back home. Work experience hasn't really been much experience, more just work. We spend most of the time raking, weeding, or carrying stuff. We do have a short presentation about some medicinal plant at the end of every session, and we get cookies and juice which is nice. When it was my turn to give a presentation on a plant, I chose to do Mangoes. I was very surprised to find out all the different ways that they can be used in treating ailments and even things like bad breathe. I had a whole page handwritten about it. (I have it on my computer too if you're interested.) I guess it just made me realize that much more all the ways in which God provides for us. As for my other classes, I've got a few pretty big projects to do this semester. I'm doing an experiment with rooting hormones on pineapples in which I actually have to plant about 60 of them in a field and observe them over 2 months. I'm also working on a group report about a development project taking place in Central America. In addition to that I have to research a non-traditional crop (something not native to Central America, or that is only produced on a small scale) and figure out all of the problems that would occur trying to grow and market that crop and develop a plan to fix those problems. Sounds like I'll be pretty busy.

Something that I'm really excited about though is that I will soon be working on a semester long project related to turf in place of retaking entomology. I've been in contact with a professor B.K. Singh here at the university who has a lot of interest in turf. He gave me several options for things that I could participate in dealing with things like landscaping, golf courses, bio fuels, and even planning an international conference to take place here next year. I decided however, with my limited amount of time here and my interests, that I would try to do like a mini internship with one of the golf courses in San Jose. (the city that I was in for language classes) This would consist of me going to San Jose for Saturday-Monday every weekend and working on the course and learning about the decision making processes that take place, and the unique challenges that are faced in this climate. The only thing is that I would have to have a place to stay while I'm there and won't be able to afford it unless the golf course compensates me for the cost. Dr. Singh is in the process of trying to work that out and I hope that it is a possibility. Also, I've met a student here named Oscar who is doing his thesis work on water management in turf and wants to work at a golf course after graduation. This coupled with the fact that he's a fourth your student and is getting ready to graduate as well, has given us a lot to talk about. He also works at the golf course on the weekends and seems to be a pretty cool guy who's worth getting to know, and who could help me out quite a bit.

This past week I was blessed with the opportunity to go on a 4 and a half day field trip with my nontraditional crops class. It was a lot of fun. We left Wednesday after lunch and headed out on our cross country tour of fincas (farms). We started by visiting an organic pineapple farm then heading on to a place called Nueva Luna to spend the night. Nueva Luna is an organic farm that has a wide variety of plants and is owned by an American company that imports ginger from them and makes medicinal products from it. In addition to being a farm, 8 months out of the year Nueva Luna also functions as a hotel/ resort with many hiking trails, cabins, a pool, and beautiful scenery. We were lucky enough to stay in the cabins this night where we each had our own bed and a cool night made for a very good nights sleep. The next day we woke up and spent the first part of the day planting trees that would eventually be used as forage for cows. After that we went to another part of the property and picked our lunch straight from the plants. We gathered leaves and other vegetables to make salad. Even the juice we had was made from leaves. It wasn't too bad but definitely one of the more unusual meals I'd ever eaten. That afternoon we left and headed on to EARTH's other campus in La Flour. This land used to be owned by a former president of Costa Rica and was donated to the school. There are a few buildings already on the grounds including the presidents house which is now used as sort of a main office. They are still in the process of developing the land before there will be permanent students and classes there, but right now it hosts many research projects and a bunk cabin for people visiting (like us). We were given a presentation of what the new campus was going to look like and what it's main purposes were. We also helped out in the mango orchard a little bit. (unfortunately none of the trees had fruit at the time) From there we went on toward the west coast where we stayed at this guys house who raises shrimp, mangoes, and a few other crops on his property. We arrived in the evening and were greated by a feast of freshly caught shrimp prepared a few different ways along with a bunch of other food to accompany. It was delicious and very relaxing as we sat on the front porch and looked off over the hill at the lights lining the opposite side of the gulf. That night we slept on mats on the floor and we attacked by bugs all night, but when we walked out on the porch in the morning and saw the trees and farm stretched out before us at the bottom of the hill, and the gorgeous gulf reflecting the suns early morning beams it was all worth it. We were shown a little bit of what goes into shrimp farming then went on our way once more. Our professor, Panfilo Taborra, (one of the funnest, happiest and nicest men I've ever met) treated us to dinner that night at a fairly nice restaurant where we had civiche (traditional fish soup type dish that they eat a lot of in Costa Rice) accompanied with appetizers and even some calamari. It was sooo good and totally comped by the prof. We arrived that night at the residence of another one of Professor Taborra's friends. This place had a nice swimming pool and a guest house with large front and back patios. I was one of the people that had to sleep outside on a hard wooden bench which did not lend itself to the best nights sleep, but as I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and put on some warmer clothes I got to witness one of the best starry nights that I've seen in a while. Everyone had gone to sleep and therefore most of lights were off and the sky was as clear as could be. I hung out for just a little bit and watched it before I went back to finish the night on the bench. (Sidenote: I've decided that it's one of my goals within the next 12 months to find a clear night no moon and a place with absolutely no lights around) For our last day we headed back toward San Jose where we toured an ornamental plants production and even got to take home some flowers. I've got 2 birds of paradise flowers and some other funky looking red flowers in my room right now. As you can probably tell the trip was very eventful and the small group made it easy to get to know people a lot better. I think being surrounded by Spanish 24/7 for those days helped a lot too. I've definitely been able to see a lot of improvement but know I'm still no where near efficient enough to have a fluid conversation.

I also have a roommate now. His name is Fransisco and he's from here in Costa Rica. I moved into his room about a week and a half ago I guess, and it's been pretty good. There are a few things that I didn't have to deal with when I had my own room, but I'm glad that that change was made. He knows decent English and maybe uses it more than he needs to, but he's trying to learn too. He's super nice and helpful, and likes really loud rock music. He's also been pretty interested in talking about turf stuff (It seems like I've met more people here that are into it than I did at home).

While things are going well, I still have my hard days and am trying to find out where I fit here. I've still not found anyone who even claims to be an active Christ follower let alone a church community to be a part of here, and I'm trying to figure out what that means for me and what God wants me to do here on the campus. I'd also really like prayers to know how to really rely on God and make Him enough during those times that I feel really alone. That said, I'm really grateful for how all of you have kept in contact with me and kept me involved with what's going on in your lives as well. I'm just trying to follow God's calling for me one day at a time and trust him even if I don't what he's doing. Thanks for reading and I'll update again soon.

Address

A few people have been asking for my address so if you'd like to send me something you can send it here. Thanks.

Brian Bowe
EARTH University
4442-1000 San Jose
Costa Rica

I think it takes about 2 weeks to get here.

TMI

OK, so this week there's a lot of information and it's really long so just stick with me. I tried to organize it in a way that things won't get confusing and it's a little less story like than some previous posts. Enjoy.

Good Bye San Jose Hello Guapiles:
I finished up my last few days in Costa Rica hanging out at the language school (even though I was done with classes), spending time with new friends that I may possible never see again, and communicating with Melissa (the study abroad person here at the University) to get all the final loose ends taken care of before I left. They weren't the most exciting days of my time here but the rest was very much needed. I left on Thursday morning and shared a cab with Jocelyn. (the girl from Mizzou who is studying abroad this semester also) The trip took about an hour and a half and we were fortunate enough to have a very interesting and very nice cab driver. At one point he randomly pulls over as we're driving down the mountain and fills his water bottle up with water streaming down the face of the rock, then proceeded across the street to relieve himself. He also made a pit stop to let us buy coconuts or fruit at a local market if we wanted to. The trip wasn't cheap and ended up costing about 20,000 colones each ($40 ish). After being shown to our rooms where we were allowed to relinquish our bags we met up with Melissa and got a quick tour around the academic part of campus and were given our class schedules.

Orientation:
The next day began with breakfast at 7 followed by an orientation meeting starting at 8. Here we were able to meet the other exchange students. (8 of us in all: 3 from U.S., one from Peru, one from Switzerland, and one from the Czech Republic) We were given a rundown of the Universities rules and expectations followed by a video about the university that was, to my pleasant surprise, in English. After this we were given another tour of the academic grounds, this time by a student, and were dismissed for lunch and free time. This was nice because it gave us a chance to get to know each other a little bit. I quickly found out that I was the weakest Spanish speaker in the bunch, with all of the other having spent time growing up in or studying in a Spanish speaking country. Next we were given a tour of some of the other parts of campus. There was the medicinal plants garden, the pig farm, the cows, the lecheria (where they make milk), the water purification plant, and even a paper making factory where they make eco-safe paper from banana and coffee byproducts. The next day was simple, morning was free and the afternoon was a trip to Guapiles to purchase anything we might not already have for classes.

Campus:
This Campus is beautiful. There are plants everywhere, so I like that, and the buildings aren't to ugly them selves, and you can't beat being able to see a volcano in the distance on a clear day. The main part of campus (where the classes and dorms and such are) is pretty small. There are only 400 students which is a huge difference from the nearly 30,000 at Mizzou, but I like the change of pace. The buildings are mostly open air with large doors that can be slid open with ceiling fans running full speed when class is going on. The cafeteria is completely open and only actually has one wall while the rest of the sides are supported solely by pillars. The buildings are connected by covered walkways and the most striking feature of the campus is the raised library (there are wide walkways and meeting rooms and the school store underneath) that overlooks what can best be described as the quad, but isn't really an very usable space as it's webbed with stone walkways complimented by small bushes and in the center is a very tall tree (of which the only foliage is at the very top of the tree) surrounded by concrete and stones laid in the shape of a leaf. There's also a small store where you can buy snacks, sodas, and general hygiene items that is attached to a student building housing pool and ping pong tables, Foosball, and two TV rooms. The rest of the 3,000 acre campus is forest reserves or land for research or teaching. The professors and their families also have a section dedicated for their housing. One of my favorite places on campus is the athletic complex a little ways away from the main campus. Not a complex like the huge building at Mizzou; but a quaint section of campus with a sandlotesque baseball field, a rather nice sized swimming pool with lap lanes, a tiny room with some weights and machines, about 4 soccer fields, and a pretty nice covered basketball/5 on 5 soccer court. I also found today hidden away slightly, a cool little sanctuary with wooden pews. It is also completely open and surrounded by gorgeous tropical plants. It doesn't look like it's used much.

Classes:
So, this is the part I was dreading. My first day of classes started at 6 which meant i had to get up at 5 in order to get breakfast. (We go Monday-Saturday here and 5 of those 6 days i have something at 6 a.m. with my only slight relief coming on Tuesdays where I get to start at 7.) We bagan the 4 hour Entomology (bugs) lab everything seemed to be going fine. I think any problems I might have had were more due to nerves than not actually getting what was happening, plus the prof. would occasionally come back to my table and give me instructions in English if I had the "I'm from another country" look on my face. When we resumed the last two hours of the class at 4 I was much more collected and it went much smoother. The profe (that's what they call them here for short) even had the class come look at my grasshopper dissection cause I did so good. (Don't worry I'll try not to get a big head.) I was also able to meet a few people from class and ate dinner with them that night. One of the guys spoke really good English and kept my informed. My Tuesday class was a little more speaking intensive because it's a lecture class, but I think after a few weeks I'll be able to understand much better. All of the Profes seem really helpful and the small classes help a lot too. On Wednesdays and Saturdays we have what is called work experience. This is where we get some hands on experience. We were fortunate in that the first day didn't start until 7:25. After arriving at the meeting spot a short jaunt from the main campus, we broke into our teams and headed off to our various work locations. For the first three weeks I'll be working in the etnobotanical gardens that contains mostly medicinal plants. We were given a quick overview of the some of the plants in the garden and what they're used for. We were even told to smell or eat parts of the plant that we were talking about. (hibiscus leaves are really good, kind of acidy like a citrus fruit). After that we spent the rest of the time clearing out dead brush and leaves and basically just cleaning up the area. This was another great chance for me to interact and meet some new people. The only bad part was I ended up with two big blisters on my heels from my new rubber boots. I also found out today that there's a guy here doing turfgrass research (weird I know, who does that?), so I'm going to see if I can't figure out a way to work with him and get some experience and if so maybe even try to drop my entomology class that I've already taken back home.

Food:
Mmmmm... The food here is SOO good. We have rice and beans at every single meal but I'm getting used to it. Other than that there's usually some kind of meat (never fried), bread and salad. They also have fresh fruit, juice and milk, all of which I think come straight from the farms on campus. Needless to say I'm eating a lot healthier here than I was in the states, and with all the activities and walking I've had to do since I've been here I'm pretty sure I've lost some weight. There's also plenty of fruits and coconuts on the property that everyone just grabs at their leisure straight from the trees.

My Room:
The rooms here are simple but not too bad. I have a bed and a closet on my side of the room along with a towel rack and a ceiling fan. The room is divided by probably the biggest desk I've ever seek, which provides plenty of storage space for all my stuff. There's no air conditioning but it cools down enough at night to make it easy to sleep and it warms up early enough to make it hard to sleep in too late. The last few days I've entered my room expecting to see a new person occupying the other half of the room, but until now have been wrong. At this point I think it's safe to say that I have my own room which makes it easy to go to bed when I need to and also stay up and not disturb anyone. I was a little worried that it would effect my opportunities to speak Spanish, but with the amount of people I've been meeting and my insecurities of speaking the language slowly fading I think I'll have all the practice I want.

Que Mas:
The other day I was taking a picture of the "quad" with the library in the background and dropped my camera on the sidewalk, thus rendering it useless for the rest of my time here. I was able to get some pictures of the university before that and will post those as soon as I can find a way to get the files off my SD card. Nevertheless, the photojournalism of my trip is no more, so sorry for all of you that have been enjoying my pictures, and your welcome to those of you who felt I was rubbing it in your face with "another album" (just kidding I hope nobody really felt that way.) Also since I've been here I think I experienced my first real bout with homesickness. There were a few days that I just felt really down and didn't want to be here. That's gradually been going away as I've met people and am getting used to things here, but I'm not foolish enough to think that it won't ever pop back up again. I was told that there would be culture shock and mood changes and ups and downs while I was here, but I guess I felt like I was too strong/not emotional enough for that to actually effect me. I was wrong, and to tell the truth it sucked. I hate being presented with this great opportunity and then feeling like I'm complaining all the time, but I feel how I feel. (Thanks to anyone who let me mope to them.) Like I said though, things have turned around and today I'm super happy to be here, but I'm still trying to learn to be content in all situations and during the times when things are harder than I think I can deal with just then. I think I've also realized the blessing of having close friends near by that you can talk about lifes crap with. Without that stuff just stays in your head, there's no outlet, and it builds and pesters. Sure I have the instant messenger and skype to talk to people but I don't want to let my problems dominate the conversation (when there's always good things to talk about as well) when i may only talk to that person once or twice in that week. So, I guess I want to say sorry if I've done that to you, but also thanks for letting me. I know I've been super blessed with family and friends, which doesn't make it any easier when I miss everyone, but also gives me reason to miss everyone. I'm in Costa Rica and I'm going to try my best to be here more than just physically, but I'm glad I can be part of what's going on back home too. I just need to figure out where the balance is, and I think I'm getting there.

P.S. I have the largest feet in the country. I had to go to two stored to find boots and still settled for a pair that was slightly too small. Go ahead make your jokes.

Stress Fracture

Hard to believe it's been a month already. Spanish lessons flew by and I've kind of been using these last few days before I leave for the University to try and slow down a little bit. It's really weird the emotions that come along with an experience like this. On one hand I can't help but miss everyone back home in the states and can't wait to go home in December. On the other hand I realize that 5 months isn't a very long time and I want to be able to experience all that I can. I can honestly say i don't know what to do about it though. How do you speed up/ slow down time, especially since there are times where I want one, and times where I want the other. I know that it's better for me to not try to rush through this since it's maybe a once in a lifetime experience and since I know that that's the only way I'll get everything I can out of it. But like i said, I don't know the formula for that. All I can do is ask God to change my heart and somehow help me slow down.

So where am i at now? Well I leave for the University on the 4th (Thursday) and we have orientation the 5th and I'll get a chance to meet the other foreigners who will be there this semester. After that I don't know what will happen before classes start on the 8th. As far as my Spanish goes I'm not where I expected to be. That in no way is a reflection on my teachers or even my ability to learn the language. I've come a long way already and don't know how I could have learned more than I did. I simply had false assumptions of what learning a language entailed. I guess I just expected it to click one day, which I admit sounds really stupid. That said, I'm almost excited that I'm where I am. This is hard, and I don't do hard things very often. I think it'll mean just that much more when all is said and done. I'm also excited because seeing how far I've come already helps me to see how much more I can still learn while I'm here and that pertains to things other than the language as well. While I'm at the University I'll have a roommate from another country, not necessarily Costa Rica. I have no idea who it will be and am anxious (both in the good and bad sense of the term) to find out who I'll be sharing my life with for the next 4 months. I'm also pretty anxious about classes as they will be taught completely in Spanish using vocabulary that I'm sure I've never heard before. But hey, that just means more stuff to learn, right? :-s No matter what happens I'm sure it'll be something that changes me, and I'm sure God will use it.

In other news, I'm still waiting on loans and there fore am pretty limited on doing anything only letting myself spend money on lunches for the most part, and entertaining myself anyway I can. (I actually got bored one night and gave myself sharpie tattoos. they're actually kinda cool and I have pictures if you want to see them. Anyway I'm a huge dork.) Mostly I've been walking, walking a lot. I spent the past three days trekking around San Jose this time trying to get away from the touristy stuff and experience the real San Jose. The other day I came across a cemetery that I spent about an hour walking around and taking pictures. It was probably the prettiest day we've had since I've been here and there was an odd sense of peace that I felt walking through grounds surrounded by mostly white raised burials, most of which sported broken or painted on crosses and long since gone name plagues. I know, it all sounds kinda weird to me too. Nevertheless, i was able to keep myself busy this weekend, and now have a really sore right foot to show for it, which I can only hope isn't a stress fracture.

Yesterday (Monday) was one of highlights from my time here. My friend Anna Wagner (who's dating one of my really good friends from Rolla and whom I've hung out with on several occasions) is in Costa Rica with a program from Greenville College where she goes to school. We'd talked only briefly before I left about the possibility of meeting up and weren't sure it was going to happen. Well, we eventually figured things out and made some plans. I walked across a crowded plaza infested with at least 100 pigeons eating seed that kids were flinging this way and that, and as i approached the "Teatro Nacional" I saw her get up from her bench and come over to greet me with a hug. It was so refreshing to see familiar face, and also very surreal at the same time. We spent the day along with one of her friends from the program walking around downtown as i showed them various places I'd visited and told them stories of my adventures here. I also got to meet her host mom, a very sweet lady who works at an art gallery down town, and who refuses to speak English with us (even though I think she's fluent) in order to help with the learning process. We finished the day sitting in Wendy's after I downed a jr. bacon cheeseburger (or JBC) just talking about everything from missing people, to what we're excited about and what scares us, to false expectations, and the general roller coaster of ups and downs. We even talked about dogs for a little bit. It was nice to be able to be really honest with someone and not have to pretend like every moment is absolute excitement and bliss. It was especially nice to realize that I'm not alone in those feelings.

So, I have a day and a half left, and after getting used to things here I get to dive head first into the unknown again. I'm beginning to like that though. I don't know what kind of lessons God has planned for me still. I don't know how I'm gonna get through classes, but I'm sure it'll be something I've never experienced before. I'm not sure who my roommate will be or what kind of people I'll end up befriending. I don't know what kind of church community I'll be able to find although I'm sure that'll be quite different than what I'm used to as well. I don't know if time will slow down or if tomorrow I'll wake up and it's a week before I leave. I don't know when my loans are gonna kick in. Heck, i don't even know where my favorite green T-shirt is right now. (the Key Sport 25th anniversary one) Surprisingly though, with all this unknown I'm not worried. In some way I feel that same sense of peace that I had in the cemetery. It's good to know that stress fractures are only effecting my feet and not my spirit or my mentality. Maybe God is working on me after all.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Prov. 3:5-6)

Fluttering Inspiration

As you can see, my blog has a slightly updated and improved look to it... (I got bored Friday) Let me know if it makes things hard to read or whatnot. I don't have much to report on this week as far as events go, as I spent yet another weekend in San Jose. This time I at least had some money and was able to see the city and some museums, parks, etc. In other news I begin my last four days of Spanish class this week, which will be followed by 6 free days that I plan to use traveling a little (granted my loans come in my then). Also, the girl who had been living at my house and a few other of my closer friends here left today to begin their volunteering programs, which leaves me to find more people who I will in turn be leaving soon.

While this was a comparatively ordinary week in Costa Rica there was one, seemingly insignificant event, did stick in my mind and kept coming back. As I was touring the city I stopped in at the National Museum, which I'd already visited but didn't have time to check out the "Secret Garden" (a butterfly garden situated in the middle of this old historic fort). I remember thinking as I was about halfway through the trail that I hadn't seen any butterflies. It was about then that I happened upon a contraption holding some old fruit in which a large, yet fairly unimpressive, butterfly was feeding. It was a kind of brownish gray and the only significant feature I could see was an eye stop for deterring predators. I stopped and simply watched it fill its proboscis(nerdy entomology term for the mouth thingy that it uses to eat) with the fruits contents. Once it was satisfied it took flight and as it fluttered this way and that I got to see the vibrant blue colors it had been hiding. This somewhat caught me off guard and being the dork that I am, really intrigued me. There was just something about that that wouldn't leave me alone, and i found it interesting how something that small could change my attitude from almost pessimistic to joyful. I know this is part of it's survival strategy but as it sat there and did next to nothing it blended in and was almost unnoticeable; but once it started doing something, flying and moving, you'd have to have to be blind not to notice it.

It's strange how God can use something you've seen over and over again and this time somehow use it to teach us something. I couldn't help but think there was a reason this stuck me so strongly, but what was it. As I replayed this image in my head throughout the day, it eventually associated itself with a bible verse I'd been trying to memorize. (A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:34-35) (Tangent: this verse originally stuck out to me because of the repetition of the phrase "love one another" three times. I got the image of Jesus just being like, "pay attention this is important... I'm not just saying this for my health... no listen, you need to love one another.") Anyway, I began to try and connect the two, the image and the verse. I tried relating us as people (and particularly as Christians) to the butterfly. If we sit around and do nothing we blend in. There may be a few interesting qualities, but over all nothing special, nothing significant. In order to show what's on the inside (a life changed by knowing Christ) we have to be doing something, but what. How do show the world what we have, how do we share that, how do we open our wings in a way that catches the attention of others and is almost impossible to miss? That's when the verse comes in. Jesus tells us three times exactly how we show the world that we are his disciple, "love one another." This love is more than an emotion, it's an action. That's what evangelism is.

I get excited thinking about this with everything that's going on back home on the Mizzou campus as my friends get an amazing chance to put this into practice starting a new school year with thousands of new students (and old ones too). It helps me focus on the reason behind handing out icee pops, talking to random people in Brady Commons, and going around to dorm rooms at the risk of being awkward or thought of as a little strange. But isn't that kind of the point. There's something different about a person that loves, something that registers as not quite right or normal, something that is noticable. This makes sense because Jesus says this is how we make ourselves known. Jesus also put in the qualifier, "as I have loved you". This, I think, is the ultimate kicker. How has Jesus loved us? The short answer is that He loved us even though we didn't deserve it, and that's how we're comanded to love one another, without making people earn it or even when they've done something that deserves the oposite. Interesting what can happen by watching a butterfly for a few seconds.

A Couple Hundred Colones Short of a Dollar

It has recently occurred to me that many of you, even those very close to me, may not know exactly why I'm here. I'm writing this as much for that purpose as I am for my own benefit and clarification. As I know my explanation will contain much talk of God I fear coming off as self-righteous or, on the other hand, with an air of false humility. Neither is my intention, only to recount the story and give credit to God where it is due. Keep in mind my tendency to do what is easy and my inclination to do what is expected, the logical next step that most people take if you will. This is a story of obedience and breaking that tendency.

I transferred to the University of Missouri (Mizzou) my sophomore year and quickly became involved with a church called The Rock, comprised mostly of college students. About a month or so into the school year came the Fall Retreat. This is where we spend a couple days out in rural Mid-Missouri away from Columbia and school to spend time with our church community and focus on god with less distractions. I knew there would be an opportunity available to be baptized. This was something I’d been thinking about since I started taking my spiritual life more seriously and gave my life to Christ a few years earlier. I'd been presented with the opportunity several times each accompanied with the inner conviction to go ahead with it. I always had an excuse ready and said I'd do it next time. (How many next times do you need?) I finally decided to obey that inner voice but only at the last minute as we were about to head to the lake, and only after talking the matter over with people like my mother and a friend I'd only known a few months (who would eventually become one of my best friends and most trusted advisors.)

This small act of obedience opened the door to more of God's requests. After years of only being asked one thing, I started to feel God's urging towards other things. One of those was to go on a mission trip to Honduras, and this time without much convincing, I attended the information meeting. I was trying to trust and follow God's tug a little better. This was maybe the first off the wall out of the ordinary thing I've done and once again god proved my obedience worth while as I was blessed with an amazing, eye opening, life changing experience.

It wasn't until after we boarded the plane and were in the air on our way home that I idea came to me that I didn't quite feel was entirely my own. What could I do to help the problems and poverty I witnessed? I mean, I study grass for Peat's sake! Well, pretty convenient for me grass is a plant and my classes have given me pretty good knowledge of plants as a whole and how they work. What if I was to go to an impoverished country like Costa Rica and start a business, a farming business perhaps? (Sounds perfect in a place where any kind of high tech business would be out of place next to houses without walls much less anything else.) I could use this business to provide jobs and pay decent wages, something that's almost unheard of in certain parts of Honduras. Build relationships and use that as a basis for sharing the most valuable thing I have, a relationship with Jesus.

Well, that was a nice idea. Not really sure what to do with it, I stored it in my mental archives revisiting it and dusting it off from time to time. I went back to Honduras in January and shortly after returning, the experience still fresh in my mind, one of my classes was visited by a man talking about study abroad. He talked of Thailand, Ireland, Australia, and Costa Rica (a country the distance of only a few states from Honduras). Study Abroad? That didn't fit into my predictable plan of high school, college, job... but again came that quiet voice. If I'm ever going to do something with this idea, this may be my best/only chance to really find out what it'll take. I picked up a brochure at the Ag School's study abroad fair that outlined the 2 and 6-week summer programs. 2 or 6 weeks, that sounds comfortable enough and I could say I looked into it and made an effort no matter how feeble.

I read about the summer programs, neither of which were really what I was looking for. When I normally would have given up there, I decided to talk with the study abroad advisor and find out if either trip was worth my time or money. After telling him about the idea I'd gotten on the plane, this eyeglassed curly haired man excitedly started telling me about a place in Costa Rica called EARTH University (sounds a little corny to me). He then continued to throw out things like semester...5 months...classes in Spanish...HOLD UP! This is more than I asked for! But in his ramblings however, he mentioned EARTH's 3 main principles of entrepenuership, community development and betterment, and sustainable agriculture. The fit was a little uncanny. All 3 things lended themselves perfectly to the idea I had waiting patiently in the file cabinet of my mind.

After taking some time to think about it and talking it over with several people, I decided that it was obvious what I needed to do, no matter how crazy or difficult it sounded. I'd be taking 4 months of classes in Spanish when my previous experience consisted of a few years of mediocrely taught Spanish from ages ago in high school that I had no problem letting slip my mind once finished with a test. After all, I was never going to need it again. Nevertheless, I decided to trust God once again and obey.

So that brings us to where I am now, a 1 month Spanish crash course, still scared of the task ahead of me, still dealing with leaving the security of friends and community back home, still trying to figure out how to depend on God fully. I don't want to make this sound like Hell, however. This is a blessed opportunity that few get to experience and that many covet. I get to be immersed in a new culture and learn a new language, even if the process sucks and is hard sometime. God has given me the opportunity to see some of his most beautiful creations from paradise-like beaches, to towering waterfalls, tropical rainforests, and the powerful awe inspiring fireworks of active volcanoes. Being a nature lover and feeling God's presence most convincingly through that creation, I could not ask for more.

As to what God's ultimate purpose behind me being here is, I can only speculate at this point. What I can do though, is to try to be fully where God has me at this season in my life, and continue to trust and obey him the best I can, no matter where that takes me.

Prayer Closet- Mathew 6:6

After meeting at the mall, a large group of us headed to Castro's; a latin dance club/bar. We arrived to discover a cover charge of 2000 colones that hadn't been required on my previous visit. (I supose it was because Dia de los madres was the following day and people had the next day of and the night to party.) This unexpected fee sapped abou 2/3 of my funds and with the prospect of paying for a taxi ahead of me I had to abstain from purchasing anything. The night was not a loss, however, as making a fool of myself on the dance floor came complimentary with the cover charge. I took a taxi home along with two other people who live near me. I was the first to get dropped of and so gave all the money I had left to the others, saving just enough for a bus ride to school in the morning.

I don't have class on Friday, but since some people do I planned on spending the day at the school working on some personal things like registering for classes at the university. My other reason for going was to get my ATM card that I had chacked into the school's safe as to not have it stolen. I used the day off to sleep in a bit and after breakfast, a shower, and a little reading was on my way. I arrived at school around 11:30 and started getting a little worried as I rounded the corner to see no cars in the parkinglot and no smiling security guard at the entrance. Having previously assumed that school would continue regardless of the holiday, I approached the door anyway. I rang the bell and hoped for something, anything, knowing I had only 15 colones (about 3 cents), not even enough for a bus ride home. My spirits lifted as the janitor answered the door, but soon faded as it became clear that he could not get into the safe. Still, he let me in to show me that my things were secure and wished me bueno suerte (good luck) as I left. Without any other option I began the trek home on, fortunately, the only day it hasn't rained since I've been here. My plans of seeing the city all weekend had been shot. I couldn't even get to the city, much less pay entrance fees to museums and such.

I can to Costa rica with the expectation of having to rely on God more than I was used to. I'd be in a new place without the friends and community i have at home. Even normal activities would be harder simply because of the language I barely knew. I was reading my devotionals, my bible, and even a little in books about prayer and grace; but I was not, I realized, relying on God. When i was lonely I'd turn to the technology of the internet and the interaction with old friends via the phenomenon that is Facebook, and when I was bored I'd go to a movie or a bar with people from school. Finally, I was at a point where I couldn't turn to those things. It was just me, God, the few books I had, and my closet of a room; even if only for a few days.

I conceided to my circumstances knowing there was nothing I could do, save waiting for Catalina to come home and borrow me some dinero. I began reading through my book about prayer that I was about half way through already. I paused from the book occasionaly to look at memory verses I'd been neglecting, or just to talk with God (my only company for most of the weekend). Eventually I was able to find Catalina and she so generously shared with me her money she'd received only days before. (Her original stash had been stolen a week ago.) I went with her and some others to a bar Friday night, downtown for lunch and a speed tour through the free national museum Saturday, and a short trip to the mall on Sunday. This only comprised a small segment of my weekend though. The rest was spent in my room. I wasn't even able to buy lunch except for the one Catalina paid for and had to use up my rations of oreos and plantain chips, since we're only provided breakfast and dinner.

By the end of the weekend, after getting over my initial disapointment and inevitable boredom, I came to apreciate the time. I still welcomed the breaks to the city but realized I was getting some much need rest in the presence of God that I couldn't help but feel like he had a hand in engineering. I nearly finished the book, only 2 of 22 chapters left. I eventually began to view my tiny closet of a room affectionately as my prayer closet. there I can be in solitude with god; reading, talking, or just sitting in silence. I simply spent time with and hung out with God; which, when you think about it, is all prayer really is. I mean how else do you build a relationship?

There were also some very interesting by products of this weekend. The frequency that I was reading the book opened up the continuation of a God talk Catalina and I had the first night we met. "What can somebody possibly say about prayer for 300+ pages?" (not an exact quote) And prayer was only the beginning of that conversation. I also had a lot of time to think, and for obvious reasons thought about money. Such power it has over us. It amazes me how much money (or lack there of) affects what we do and what we focus on. 20 bucks would have completely changed the events and focus of my weekend. It has the power, great power, to control us. Now, i'm not saying money is a bad thing, but I can see a little more clearly now why Jesus warned so harshly against the love of it.

Hostel Territory

So I've got one week down, and what a busy one it was. So, dang, I guess I'll start with classes. They have been amazing. I've learned a lot in just the five days taken them. My teacher (Daniel) is really cool and nice. He's actually a year younger than me too which is a little wierd. I've gotten a chance to hang out with him outside of class a few times and he speaks really good english when he's not teaching. He doesn't give much homework either, which is nice. The first week it was just me and two others in the class (Anna and Courtney, from Germany and the states respectively) I got to know them pretty well over the course of the week and we had a lot of fun joking around in class.

Outside of class has been fairly eventfull as well. On Monday I met Catalina (A german girl living at the same house as me) who had been away at the beach all weekend. It was really cool because we got into about a two hour conversation about God that night after dinner. Her english is pretty good. Tuesday night I went to a roller dico with some people from the school (there are a lot of Germans here) which was really fun for about 30 minutes then it just felt like skating in circles. Wednesday I went to Wall-E for the second time (first time in spanish though). Good thing there isn't much dialog in that movie. Thursday night was really fun. I debated staying in because I had to get up at 5:45 on Friday to head to Puerto Viejo (more on that later) but finally decided to go to Castro's which is a latin dance club/ bar. There were a lot of people from the school there and I got a chance to make a fool out of myself, meet some new people, and even get some lessons from the locals.

So, Puerto Viejo... that was an experience. I arrived at the school to meet our bus at 6:30 to learn that the only other two guys that were suposed to go had backed out. (one of whom actually still went, just with another group.) So it was me and 6 German girls who, when they remembered, tryed to speak english for me. We arived about 5 hours later and since we couldn't get ahold of any hostels the day before had the task of trying to find a place to stay. The first two places we went to looked very nice, and they must have been because they were full. So we finally found a place just down the road that had rooms available. We decided to stay there for atleast one night, but it was pretty shady. It turns out it was mostly a hang out for stoners, but they were all very nice. There's a lot of rasta culture at Puerto Viejo I found out. The room I was in was just about big enough for 3 beds and that's all that was in there, and not very comfortable ones either. They also had a metal fan spinning about 3 feet above the top bunk where I was sleeping. With out any other real options we headed out for a beach we had found in the travel guide. It was on but there was a lot of debris from trees and stuff since it's the rainy season. There were also several dogs roaming around aparently looking for food. Nevertheless, it was nice to be somewhere warm and away from the rainy chilly San Jose. After returning to the hostel that evening we decided to save some money and make pasta at the hostel's kitchen. That was fun. After scavenging for enough pots and having to go buy plastic plates and forks we were able to start cooking. We ended up making about 3 times more noodle than we needed, but were able to give them to some other people who were cooking there who said they'd use them for breakfast! We then went out to this really cool bar that was all open air (just like everything in Costa Rica) and had live music. The next day went a little smoother. After getting up, packing and doing a couple tricks on the hostel's trampoline we went back to one of the hostels we'd tried the day before and were able to get enough rooms. This Hostel was WAY better. They had large rooms, clean facilities, hammocks everywhere, exotic plants all over, and one room even had it's own bathroom. We then went to a beach at the national park near Limon which was a lot nicer than the beach the previous day. The waves there were the biggest I'd gotten a chance to be in and there was miles of trail in the forest that we explored a little as I was able to get pictures of really cool plants and insects and such. (I get made fun of for getting excited about plants and bugs here too.) That night we decided to spend a little more money and go out to a resturaunt for dinner. most of us ordered wood oven pizza and we enjoyed a live regae band. Needless to say I slept much better that night. The next day we just went to a beach within walking distance from where we were staying which was pretty rocky but had very clear water and was the perfect temperature. We then comenced our 4 hour drive back to San Jose.

After arriving home I discovered that Catalina had her bag stolen at a near by park which contained most of her money and her camera with all the pictures she'd taken. She is alright though and was able to cancel her credit card and have more money sent from home. Later that night we went with Daniel (He and Catalina kinda like eachother) and one of his friends to a classical music concert. All over Costa Rica there is a music festival going on where all the concerts are free. The one we went to was a guy playing the organ at this old catholic church and even though it about put me to sleep it was really beautiful.

So, thus concludes my first week. I started my second week of classes today and have two new people to get to know. I also have my computer at school now so I have internet access to use skype if I can remember to bring my camera/microphone. I'm also working on uploading pictures but facebook is being dumb. Sorry this is so long, but thanks for reading. I miss you all and hope all is well. Later.

Estoy aqui, finilamente!

Man, there´s nothing like starting out with some adventure. I'm enjoying my first day here in San Jose Costa Rica but not without some mishaps and forgetfulness on my part. It kind of started when I forgot my dress shoes for my cousin´s wedding and had to wear my Flojos (flipflops) but i could just use the excuse that I was trying to acustom myself to the Costa Rican lifestyle. It was toward the end of the reception though that I realized I had forgotten my international student ID and had to drive round trip 3 hours to get the little piece of plastic. (I grabbed my dress shoes too) but again trying to look on the bright side I got to spend some time with my dad and say goodbye to Josh who I didn´t see before I had originally left. So i got to sleep around two and woke up at four to get to the airport for my 6 o´clock flight. We arrived to a large line and computer problems that resulted in a very hurried atemp to get through security and to my gate before my plane left. It didn´t work. I was rescheduled for the 3 15 flight and was awarded 14 dollars in food vouchers and a 400 hundered dollar flight voucher that I can use later. Well I got some more sleep and lunch and went back to the airport, this time only taking about 20 minutes to get to my gate. I was able to properly say good bye to my family this time though. Upon waiting to board the flight, i heard my name being called and was upgraded free to first class (high rollin, I know). That flight went well and I made it to the gate in Atlanta well before the scheduled departure time, which eventually got delayed and then delayed again do to storms in the area. We left about 2 hours late but I was finally on my way, next stop Costa Rica. I was relieved to find my bags had succesfully arrived(since they got sent on the flight I was originally suposed to be on.) As I exited the airport i was greeted by a friendly woman holding a sign that read ¨Brian Bave¨I was taken to my house was i was welcomed by Jose(everyone else was sleeping) and went pretty much straight to bed. I awoke this morning to voices belonging to people I´d not yet met. It was wierd to come out of my room knowing that. I walked into the kitchen to find Yinette (my hostess) making me a huge chocolate chip pancake with a side of banana and grapes. It was deliscious. I was also warmly welcomed by Mia, a very excited 3 week old puppy. Not sure what kind of dog but it´s fluffy and won´t get very big. Yinette and her Daughter Maria showed me around the city a little bit and told me how to get to school. I start tomorrow and am getting pretty excited. I don´t have internet at my home so I may only be able to get to the interwebs about once a week until september when I go to campus, but would love to hear from everyone. Welp thanks for reading and check back soon. I´ll be praying for you.