Clarity

First thing's first... The pool opened today!!!! I haven't been back yet, but you better believe that tomorrow after work I'm gonna be soakin up some rays. Gotta work on my base tan for Panama. That's right, I said Panama. My visa expires in about a week and a half so I "have to" leave the country for 3 days. This is actually the perfect time. The first year students have their integration week next week. (Not sure exactly what that is but they have activities all week and therefore I have none of my first year classes) Also, the fourth year class that I'm taking is canceled for the next couple weeks since we spent so much time on that field trip about a month ago. Therefore, I have the whole week free after Saturday and won't have to miss any classes. The other exchange students and I are going to a little island place via ferry just across the Costa Rica border. I'll be sure to take tons of picture. I'm not sure exactly when we'll return. I guess it depends on if we want to make the journey down to the canal or not. Either way I'll be gone til at least Wednesday.

I started my first day of work this week and it was really good. I left here around one on Sunday for San Jose (took about 4 1/2 hours to get to the course) and when I got there had to find the Hector, the guy that runs the club house. He came and picked me up at the front gate and we went first to his house to get some sheets and a pillow for me to sleep on, then to a grocery store to get anything I might need for my short stay. He showed me the room that I was going to stay in which was basically a fold out couch against one wall, and boxes and other storage stuff shoved into the other side of the room. It was still a little early and without really asking Hector told me to come with him and he drove me around showing me the area and all the things that I should know. Then we even went a little out of San Jose to Cartago, which was apparently the first capitol of Costa Rica. We drove by the old church ruins which is a pretty big tourist site, then parked at the center of town which encircles a giant cathedral where an image of the Virgin Mary supposedly appeared some years ago. The place was gorgeous but there was a mass going on so we were only able to see the outside. On our way back Hector stopped us off at a Chinese restaurant that he frequents and wouldn't let me pay for anything. It was a little rough sleeping that night, (The couch wasn't too comfortable and I didn't really know what to expect the next day so I kept thinking about that.) but I was able to get a decent nights rest before I had to get up at 5 am. The morning was nice and cool outside and felt great, which made it really funny to see everyone showing up in jackets and even a scarf. For my first assignment I went with a guy named Miguel to fill in divots on all the tee boxes and driving range that were made over the weekend. Miguel is an older guy and a pretty interesting one at that. He was really easy to talk to and at one point after we were talking about who we thought would win the presidential election he just out of nowhere said "Jesus, I am Christian, I love Jesus!" It was great! It was the only thing he said in English all day, and he even said Jesus like "Gee-zus" not "Hey-zeus". The topic of church and God came up a couple more times that day and it was nice to at least try to talk about it a little. He even shared part of his testimony with me and from what I understood I was really encouraged. The assistant superintendent was pretty open with being a Christian also. Looks like I may have finally found some resemblance of a community here after all. After we filled holes I was sent off to help dig one... A big one. With it being the rainy season, there's a lot of water and a certain low spot was pretty soaked so we were digging it up and replacing the clay soil with rock and sand to help with the drainage. It was hard work, but I liked it and was able to get to know the other people working there too. I finished my day around three as the rain started coming in. The bus ride back was a little more efficient as it only took me about 3 hours until I was at the cafeteria eating dinner. I was very satisfied with my first day and will probably be going back for Mondays and Wednesdays for the next 7 weeks of the semester. It'll be a lot of bus rides but I hope it's worth it.

Classes are still going pretty well. I'm lost a lot of the time, but I've been able to get everything turned in on time so far and I've even had my first two tests this past week. They were a little intimidating, knowing that they'd be all in Spanish. For one of my classes a lot of the material came from articles that took me way too long to read since I had to keep stopping and looking up words and then going back and trying to remember the information. Despite all of that I think they went pretty well. I haven't gotten the results back yet, but I feel pretty good. I mean, I only have to pass.

Not only have I been receiving some clarity with schedule and school stuff, but I feel like I've been hearing from God a little more clearly lately too. I've been a little more regular with my time spent with Him and just my overall focus I think, and I've been seeing a difference. One of the things that seems to keep coming up a lot lately is dying to myself and making myself a servant to others. God's really been showing me the areas of my life that I've been being selfish and really challenging me with developing a legitimate servants attitude. (not looking for praise or noticeable acts or serving when it serves me) My pride's definitely taken a few hits lately. I think another area that God's been getting at me lately is my obsession for efficiency and production. I'm learning that the sign of a good disciple isn't busyness or how much he gets done, but where his focus is. Jesus spent hours with God, and often even left to get away and be alone. Heck, one time he was told that his friend was dying and he stayed for two more days were he was before going to him. (Of course he raised the guy from the dead once he got there, but you know what I mean.) Anyway I guess what I'm saying is that I'm trying not to worry about what I'm "doing" here or what changes as a result of all of this, and am just trying to follow and focus on God and let the chips fall where they may. It sounds obvious... If we keep our eyes on God and listen to and follow his voice, then he's going to accomplish what he has planned. But I think a lot of time we get the idea in our head that we know what needs to be done and we spend all our energy on that then we get to busy miss when that fleeting really important thing happens. I'm not saying that we should just sit around and wait for something to fall on our laps, but that our work should be going to God and listening and following what HE wants us to do. I'm think that's what Jesus did.

This Thursday is a milestone for two reasons. One... it's my birthday! It'll be my first away from family and friends and I'm not saying this so that you'll all have to remember and tell me happy birthday. (Facebook does that well enough.) I don't have anything specific planned for that day, but I don't have any class, so I think sleeping in will be a good way to celebrate. I've also heard some rumors that some of the students here might be planning a little something. Hopefully there's cake. Thursday also marks the beginning of my last two months here. Even though it's only about 10 days different, 2 months sounds like a lot shorter amount of time then half way does. Who knows if it'll fly or drag? Who knows if it'll be full of challenges or bliss or moments of both or something all together different? All I know is that there will be days that I say "I only have 2 months left" and days that I say "I still have two months left." Whatever happens, I'm thankful for that time and will do with it the best I know how.

Golf, Cameras, and Sushi

It's the end of the third quarter and I'm tired of watching the Tigers suck it up so I thought this would be a good time to write. Another week of classes and I'm getting pretty well adjusted to the routine. Things have slowed down a bit which is good and what I wanted, but still kind of hard at the same time. Next week marks the midpoint of my time abroad. (I thought it was this week, but I was wrong) My Spanish is improving little by little and I'm making more of an effort to use it now than I have been before. Classes are becoming a little easier to understand, but also getting busier with tests and projects piling up. I still can't seem to get completely in the mind set that I'm at an actual school since it's so different here with the schedule and structure and just the surroundings.

Last weekend I made the trip to San Jose to meet Arnoldo Quiros, the superintendent at Monteran golf course just a little outside of the city. I left campus on Monday and had to figure out the bus system to get to San Jose. The bus from EARTH only goes to a little town just down the road, so I had to go from there to Guapiles about 30 minutes away, and from Guapiles I was able to hop on a bus to San Jose, and never really had to wait long at either place. When I got to San Jose I called up my friend Daniel. (He was my Spanish teacher the first month I was here.) Daniel had told me that I could stay at his mom's house when he heard I might be working in San Jose and needing a place to live, but I wasn't able to get a hold of him directly to tell him that I was coming into town that day. Luckily he was home and was able to meet me at the mall. So after hiking down town and finding another bus to the mall I met up with Daniel and he was able to give me keys to his house and draw me a crude map on how to get there before he headed off to work. After boarding two more buses and continually questioning whether I just passed the stop that I needed, I finally arrived at the right place. (Got everything right the first time. I was kind of impressed.) I entered through the front gate that guarded the entrance for three homes, and made my way trying to find the little path I was supposed to take as was illustrated on the map. This path really was little and kind of over grown and really wet because it'd been raining. I made my way to the house and was greeted by a barking dog and the smiles of Daniel's mom and her sister. We talked a little bit and I was able to explain my situation and she was able to lay down some ground rules. She's a very nice lady and was super helpful. She even gave me extra blankets so I wouldn't get cold. The next morning was back to the buses. I needed to go downtown and from there I didn't know what bus I needed and had to figure it out. At first I got on the wrong one but fortunately it was headed in the right direction and was able to drop me off where I could get on the right bus. I showed up to the gated community of Monteran and had to approach the security guard and tell him why I was there. After a few minutes of waiting I got picked up by Arnoldo in a golf cart and we took off to tour the place. The first part we drove through was full of huge houses and gorgeous landscaping. (He told me they go for about a million dollars a piece.) We eventually made it to the golf course where we stopped at each of the nine holes, one of which had an amazing view overlooking the City. As we drove around we talked about what I wanted to do there and what he expected of me. After all that was out of the way and I'd met the other people that worked there we decided that it would be in the best interest of both of us for me to come help out a few days a week. He's a really cool guy and I think I can learn a lot from him and the experience even if he doesn't speak English very well. (Just another way we can help each other out) The only thing unresolved when i left was where I'd be staying when i was in San Jose. It took a few days to hear back from him and it sounds like I may just be sleeping in his office while I'm there, unless they can find somewhere else later on. He also offered to bring me food so I wouldn't have to buy it every day. I'm still not sure exactly when I'll start, maybe this Monday. Communication down here seems to be a lot less efficient than in the states, but hopefully I can get him on the phone tomorrow.

Some other great news came by the way of mail last week. My friend/roommate Keith had told me he was sending me a package but wouldn't tell me what was in it. Needless to say, I was curious. I got a call Monday night (about two and a half weeks later) telling me that I needed to stop by the mail room and sign for a package. Since I was already getting ready to go to the library with Tony, a guy who's in my group for a class project, we just decided to swing by there on the way. The box was just short of being bomb proof I think. After wrestling with it for a few minutes (and fortunately not breaking any of the contents) I was able to pry the top off and find out what treasures awaited me. What I pulled out was brand new Cannon digital Camera accompanied with notes from friends, and even some movies. (I'll be posting links so my photo albums at the bottom of the blog for those of you who don't have facebook.) There was a list of about 19 people that pitched in to cover the cost. I was taken aback and surprised (Tony was impressed too), but when I think about it I shouldn't have been. It's just like them to do something like that, and I've totally been blessed with some great friends. The camera was great, but I actually think the notes had the biggest impact. They came at a time that I'd been feeling a pretty overwhelmed and lonely and all that kind of went away when I was reminded of all the people that were thinking about me and caring about me. What could be more important than that, right? It's kind of strange, but my Tourette's had been acting up worse than it's been since senior year of high school, (If any of you were in my anatomy class when Mr. Sells asked if I needed to go to the nurse, you know what I'm talking about) but since the beginning of this week I've hardly noticed it at all.

Last time I updated I talked about a field trip I went on with one of my classes, Cultivos No Tradicionales with professor Panfilo Taborra. Well this week that same professor took us on a trip to San Jose to check out some specialty supermarkets, (like oriental and import stuff) and afterward took us to a prety nice Chinese restaurant where we were treated with sushi, some other deliciousness that I didn't recognize, and even teppanyaki. (you know, when they cook the food right in front of you and flip and throw the food all around.) I also had some "mango verde" juice to drink which was sooo good. I can't believe that actually counts as class. Desert was even included. He's definitely my favorite professor that I've ever had. He's a little loopy, but he smiles more than anyone I know, is super generous, and has an answer for anything you could possibly ask him.

So as I said in one of my earlier blogs, I'm here because I feel like this is where God wanted me this semester. I still don't know exactly why and I think I'm starting to be OK with that. I know that God is going to use this time and that I'll be a different person for it. I guess I've just been expecting this big super significant miraculous thing to happen, expecting Him to totally come in and turn me into... I don't even know what, or to take this campus and make it full of people crazy for him over night. But what if that's not how God works? Maybe what God is doing here and in me is (in my eyes) a little thing. I don't want this to turn into a sermon or anything about how and when God intervenes or try to dissect the examples in the bible. I don't know if I could even do a very good job of that. I just know that when I really think about it I don't think God typically works in big over powering miracles, but rather with a soft whisper and a simple request, "Come unto me." Sometimes he doesn't let us know where we're going or even what exactly we're supposed to be doing along the way. That's where I'm finding myself now. I'm always asking "What's the purpose of me being here?" and "What do I need to be doing right now?" I haven't really got an answer for those. Maybe I'm asking the wrong questions, or maybe God is being silent on purpose and I just have to know that he is good and that he hears me. What I do know is that God wants me to come to him, and as long as I do that then everything else will be taken care of. I don't know why we feel like we have to be doing something all the time or like we have to be "useful" and "productive". Like the God of the universe can't do what he wants without our help? He's in control. I just have to learn to listen. I just have to learn how to go to him, obey, and leave everything else in his hands.

Here's the links to all my photo albums since I've been here:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2287348&l=e9536&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2287738&l=44227&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2292083&l=8db40&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2293962&l=316aa&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2294306&l=f5c69&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2294999&l=71f54&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2303568&l=da66e&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2303891&l=92ef7&id=15935002
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2303893&l=699d7&id=15935002

I'll try to post the links for other albums when I make them too.
(for some reason I don't think all these are working, so if you want just send me an e-mail and I'll resend you the links there... bwbb66@mizzou.edu)